An Open Letter To My Past and Present

(Posted to Linkedin - March 2026)

Ten years ago, I left New York and moved to Colorado for the second time.  My world changed. Not just geographically, but energetically in a way beyond my expectations, or anything I could fathom.   

I began to experience a shift, and not just my personal freedom moving to the mountains, but energetically. I was introduced to Energy Psychology, which had been a foreign concept when in grad school, or when I pivoted and started my career in media, sports and sponsorships. 

While in New York, I had begun to recognize and internalize that I didn't particularly care for the person I was. 

There were varying levels of stability and instability across my life. Juggling personal relationships, being a father, intertwined with a career and managing those dynamics and the heightened and persistent insecurities were taking their toll. 

Finding passion in a career that I liked, and was sometimes good at, was rewarding, but politics and the feeling of expendability were ever present and challenges I struggled with. 

Hard is good, but feeling like I was losing control was not. I didn’t have, or more likely, make time to reflect, see myself, and develop a clearer understanding of my role in my life. 

In not digging in and learning what makes me, me, I allowed others to take control of my existence. I allowed myself to point the finger, and find people who were like minded and validated my feelings. 

I was entrenched either trying to salvage or enhance my own self-worth and righteousness. 

Now there are people during my journey that were self-centered and manipulative, but that’s my perspective. Maybe they weren’t. I’m sure people have felt the same about me. The only constant was  despite my perceived best intentions to be in control of myself, I wasn’t. 

After grad school, I hustled, was creative, cultivated and nurtured a career. There was no faking it til I made it. Faking it was a false narrative. I was in it. I was there. There were expectations, opportunities, and yes consequences. (BTW, this perspective doesn't exclude people who are just fake.)  

I felt unequipped, anxiety ridden and lost. But despite those insecurities, as well as actual and perceived judgements from others, I was a team player and not afraid to work hard. I felt like I had to in order to stay afloat and justify my place. I was terrible at things like copyediting and Excel, but I had experiences, understanding and abilities that allowed me to see the playing field a little differently. 

Unconsciously, that is where I aggressively leaned in. 

Often it all worked in my favor, and other times my rooted emotional patterns and insecurities were deconstructive. I didn’t know how to deal with them, and in a polarity-multicolored world I felt and constructed my existence in an unforgiving black and white.   

Since moving back to Colorado, I have refocused on my present and future. I didn’t want to spend the next 40 years becoming more entrenched and narrow minded in my perspectives. I wanted to be open, challenge myself and find greater clarity, while being practical. 

Today, I have my own practice, see clients and help them engage their conscious and unconscious to emotionally and physically shift their past, regulate themselves, and write their future in ways they didn’t know were possible (especially without trips to the jungle).     

My life and what I do now is such a departure from my past, that being open and honest in a forum like this was terrifying. It was the same anxiety, perceptions and judgement I historically couldn’t get past.  

Is this my Jerry McGuire moment? Maybe, and I wouldn’t be me if this didn’t have a movie reference. 

That said, you don’t need to be in Colorado to explore yourself, who you are and optimize who you want to be. It’s yours for the taking wherever you are. 

My energetic and idealistic evolution is my reality. For those of you that are curious about what I’m talking about or just want to say hi, I’d love to hear from you. For those who have less productive thoughts about me, “in case I don’t see you, good afternoon, good evening and good night.” 

Peace be the journey.
Pete